F is for Favorite Things

F is a pretty tricky letter. When I thought to myself “F is for…,” a not so nice word popped into my head. Though I have a lot of comments about that word (I love that it is so versatile it can basically be any part of speech–verb, noun, adjective, anything!) I decided there probably should censor myself and pick a different topic. So I thought of things that make me happy and that led me to think about all of my favorite things.

Sadly I am not Oprah, so when I talk about all of my favorite things those of you who are reading this will not be receiving them as gifts (If you have never seen an episode of Oprah’s favorite things I highly recommend it. I don’t know why but there is something fun about watching that women give free things away). I just want to get that out there in the open so none of you are disappointed when you look under your chair and there is no fabulous present waiting for you. Anyway, here is a list of some of my favorites!

-Color: Purple. I used to be obsessed and everything I owned was purple. That made me hate it for about ten years. I am back to loving it.

-Food: Chocolate. Specifically dark chocolate. Hot gooey dark chocolate fudge brownies with chocolate chunks are unbelievable. Notice I didn’t list this as my favorite dessert, it is my favorite food.

-Drink: Water. I don’t like carbonation (you would literally have to pay me to get me to drink a can of soda) and the smell of coffee is so off-putting to me that I don’t think I have ever even been able to try a sip. I truly love water. I am rarely spotted without my Brita water bottle (another one of my favorite things) and I am probably one of the few people out there who actually drinks the recommended 8 glasses a day. Yes it is a healthy habit, but if you are considering drinking more water, beware that people will think you are strange when you have to go to the bathroom every hour.

-Website: Buzzfeed. This is a new obsession. I really like lists and most of the articles are in list format, so that’s cool. Also it is hilarious. Getting the Buzzfeed app on my phone was probably the biggest mistake I made all year though.

-Game: Cards Against Humanity and Sudoku. Cards Against Humanity is my favorite multi-player game. For those of you who don’t know, it is sort of like Apples to Apples but all grown up (it is quite inappropriate). Every time I play I laugh so hard I think I am going to pee in my pants. Sudoku is my favorite solo player game. I especially love playing it on my phone so I can keep track of things like my fastest time. I am really competitive, especially against myself, and Sudoku is great for facilitating my inner competition.

-Music: Fake Rap. I don’t know what else to call it, but I like it when rap music has a super catchy beat to it. I also love 80s pop music. Sometimes I think I was born in the wrong decade because I love 80s music so much, but then I snap out of it.

-Hobby: Television. I am an avid television watcher. People don’t usually consider this a hobby, but I can assure you I devote more time to keeping up with it than my friends do with their hobbies. A long time ago I stopped being embarrassed about it and realized that I don’t judge others for their hobbies so they shouldn’t judge me for mine. Yes I keep up with about 20 shows at any given time (it is sadly less during the summer), but I learn a lot and get to experience so many worlds that are different from my own.

-Miscellaneous favorite things: Fuzzy blankets, argyle socks, the Olympics, being nocturnal, jokes, that clean feeling right after you brush your teeth, travel (except for airplanes), being a bad dancer, my computer, sleeping, and chocolate (yes I felt the need to list it again).

What is your absolute favorite thing?

 

J

C is for Cliche

I considered making this post about chocolate (I have a sweet tooth), or possibly all my favorite candies that start with the letter “C” (caramels, candy corn, Cadbury Eggs, candy canes, etc…did I mention I have a sweet tooth?). Then I thought I should write something with a bit more substance to it than the merits of sugary treats. And since I can’t have my cake and eat it too, I chose something of substance over something with sugar (for the first and probably last time in my life). I can see all of you writers out there rolling your eyes and cringing at the thought of using cliches, and cringing once more at the thought of devoting an entire blog post to them. I, on the other hand, think that cliches are cliche for a reason: they are funny and awesome and accurately sum up a situation. Here are some of the most notable cliches that I just so happen to have commentary about:

1) Misery loves company– I could not agree more with this cliche. Whenever I am feeling down about something, what often cheers me up is hearing about the pain of somebody else. Yes I sound like a terrible person, and maybe this makes me one (let’s just hope that “what goes around comes around” doesn’t apply in this case) but I truly cannot help it. I think this is why people want to watch depressing Nicholas Sparks movies when they are sad.

2) Laughter is the best medicine– Even better than someone else’s misery! I read once that if you fake a smile when you are sad you can sometimes trick your body into thinking you are happy and then soon enough you will be (fake it ’till you make it?). So if you are sad and have no laughter around, holding a pencil in your teeth will help you to fake a smile and be happy. Or you can just watch this hilarious video of an insane women who is obsessed with sponge art and gets so into it that she actually tells herself in third person to calm down. I watch it more often than I care to admit, and it never gets old. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ptwqeP4Feak

3) You are what you eat– Really? Today apparently I am a breakfast bar, cottage cheese, rice cakes, some dark chocolate, and a calzone. At least I am delicious? I have mixed feelings about this one. I know what it is implying but I still don’t like thinking of myself as being made up of food.

4) A horse of a different color– I love saying this one. What I don’t love is when I get blank stares in response from my peers. It saddens me when people haven’t seen the Wizard of Oz. Then they think I am the strange one. I think they need to go visit the wizard and get a clue.

5) Nothing in life is free- False. I once one a MacBook on the radio. It was very much free and made me feel pretty bad-ass. Not that it took any skill to win, but still, go me! Other than this though, yeah pretty much nothing is free.

6) Sight for sore eyes– Growing up I had only ever heard this cliche used sarcastically. As a result I thought it had the opposite meaning. While I am still in favor of using sarcasm around children (it is an important skill for them to learn!) just beware it might embarrass them when they are in their twenties and learn they had been misusing a phrase their entire life.

7) You catch more flies with honey– No thanks, I don’t want any flies. I have more than enough as it is.

8) The early bird catches the worm– I like to think that the night owl actually gets the worm before the early bird even wakes up. Then that owl gets to sleep all day with a full belly while the early bird fights off the other early birds. Sounds great to me. I am such a night owl that I am up way past my bedtime and need to go to sleep though now, so alas I am done writing for today.

Do you have any notable cliches you want to discuss? Clearly I would love to hear about them. Please don’t wait for pigs to fly!

 

J